Retractions

I have a few corrections to make.

1. My sincerest apologies go out to the scientists and workers that put rounded metal poles into Green Lake in the early '80s. I did not intend to offend them by calling them creepy weirdos and claiming they are the "stuff of which urban legends are made." One piece of advice though, next time you insert anything into a lake that nature can gradually form into a weapon, go back and check a few years later. Do it for the kids.

2. I did indeed look fat in the dress I bought for Amy and Taylor's wedding. The print doesn't lend itself to flattering photographs. I will not post any pictures of myself in this dress. Trust. It didn't look good.

3. I do not consider any of my friends Suzy McFluzy (promiscuous yet lovable). If you think I was referring to you please note that all characters in that post are mere fiction and solely the creation of the author. Any resemblance to an actual person, living or deceased, is purely coincidence.